“Am I on a terrorist watchlist? Will I be labeled a terrorist?” Activists ask me questions like this all the time. Now you can find out if you are a terrorist using this convenient flow chart!

Click on the image for the full-sized version. And scroll down for information on why the chart flows the way it does…

For more information on each segment of the chart:

• When are Militias and Tea Party Members “Terrorists”?

• Arizona’s “Show Me Your Papers” Law is About More than Immigration

• They Start With “Eco-terrorists,” then There’s a “Blurring of the Lines”
  
• An overview of how animal rights and environmental activists are being labeled the top domestic terrorism threat: “What is the Green Scare?”

The terrorism rhetoric of corporations is absurd and can be funny at times, but it has dangerous consequences if we allow it to go unchecked. For example, there are secretive political prisons on U.S. soil for “domestic terrorists.” Daniel McGowan, an environmental activist, is housed there. Please follow this link and submit a comment against the government’s proposal to make them permanent.

I love, love, love these doormats. Too bad they already sold out at Target.com after being featured on BoingBoing.

Crossing my fingers the company who made these will come out with a “You Can Talk to My Attorney.”

On a more serious note, if you are an activist who has experienced harassment because of your political beliefs (or your perceived political beliefs) please call the National Lawyers Guild “Green Scare Hotline,” 1-888-NLG-ECOL, and contact us at GreenIsTheNewRed.

Sarah Kramer makes “domestic” terrorism look good.

Check out some of her fantastic vegan cookbooks below, including Vegan a Go-Go and the classic How It All Vegan. If you buy them through these Amazon links, a portion will be donated to GreenIsTheNewRed.com.

And holidays are coming up, folks, so show the domestic terrorists in your life you love them. You can order an apron at GreenIsTheNewRed.com/blog/shop. Every penny goes back into website costs, flier distribution and other projects related to exposing the Green Scare and campaigns to label animal rights and environmental activists as eco-terrorists and domestic terrorists.

Thanks very much to Sarah for having the same twisted sense of humor that we do.

This clip is about two years old, but it’s too good to keep to myself. At The Connecticut Forum, Ann Coulter says her hero is Joseph McCarthy (I mean, what’s not to love? Blacklists, naming names, ruining lives– a true American icon whose legacy lives on). She then says if she could be anyone in history, she’d be FDR so she could stop passage of the new deal. Al Franken handles her dumbassery perfectly.

By former Los Angeles Times cartoonist Tony Peyser:

This is what happens when ya’ll leave me unsupervised on holidays.

This kittie may be as adorable as his pals over at iCanHasCheezburger.com, but don’t be deceived. He’s part of the “number one domestic terrorist threat.”

The original photo was sent to me by activists in California, protesting animal researchers connected to UCLA. Here’s more on that.

I also put it up on the GreenIsTheNewRed.com Flickr account if you want it…

Last week I wrote about how some Homeland Security officials don’t think Timothy McVeigh is a terrorist, but peace activists, animal rights activists, pro-choice activists and environmentalists are.

You know who else are terrorists? Nuns!

The Saginaw News reports that among the 53 non-violent activists labeled as “terrorists” in that Maryland operation are two Dominican nuns.

They’re both outspoken opponents of war and empire, and have gone so far as to spill their own blood on military equipment in non-violent civil disobedience. From the news article:

Platte, Gilbert and Sister Jackie Hudson served time in federal prison after they cut a chain-link fence surrounding a Minuteman III missile silo in Weld County, Colo., and used baby bottles to dispense their own blood in the shape of a cross on the silo.

A federal jury in 2003 convicted Platte, Gilbert and Hudson of obstructing national defense and damaging government property. They received prison sentences of 41 months, 33 months and 30 months, respectively.

As someone who briefly attended Catholic school, I will attest that nuns can truly be terrifying. I wholeheartedly support rounding them up and protecting the knuckles of school children everywhere.

However, the rest of you might think this is, I dunno, how do I say this, ABSOLUTELY FRIGGIN’ INSANE. So, I think this video clip sums things up better than I ever could. If you don’t like bad words, please put on your earmuffs…

“To all the real terrorists out there, I say I’m sorry for gettin’ all up on your list.”

“Eco-terrorism” is a buzzword that corporations and the politicians who represent them have been throwing around more and more since 9/11. But like the bigger T-word, it’s a term without much of a definition. “Eco-terrorism” has been used to describe burning SUVs, and other property crimes by the Animal Liberation Front and Earth Liberation Front. It has been used to describe terrorism against the environment. It has been used to describe real estate deals. It has been used to describe attending vegan potlucks, dating the wrong people, and children’s movies.

One might think that definitions of “terrorism” have been expanded to the point of being completely meaningless (and therefore incredibly dangerous).

But if you’re confused about this “Green Scare,” and all the “eco-terrorist” scare-mongering, have no fear. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you the eloquent, the passionate, Rep. Frank Niceley defining “eco-terrorism” for the Tennessee General Assembly:

“First let me try to explain eco-terrorism. I’m surprised that you haven’t heard of it. Take one group, the PETA group. According to the FBI they’re the number one domestic terrorist group in America. They are considered eco-terrorists.

Eco-terrorists are, uh, I guess left-wing eco-greenies. They don’t have leader. They’re a leaderless terrorism group. They just kind of spring up sporadically. They do things like, uh, turn research animals out on the interstate, turn farm animals loose from semis in the middle of town. They drive spikes in logs going that go into the saw mill so that it will knock the teeth out of the saw mills. They put sugar in uh, in firefighting equipment in the, in the national forest, and, and just uh, it’s a different type of terrorism. They don’t have Osama bin Laden leadin’ ‘em…”

PETA isn’t listed as a “terrorist” organization, and activists don’t release animals on the interstate or the middle of town, but facts don’t mean much in this “War on Terrorism.” Niceley (previously featured here on GNR defending a drunk-driving colleague) was speaking in favor of his bill, HB 3307, the “Tennessee Ecoterrorism Act.” It never made it out of committee, but its language appeared in the Animal Enterprise Terrorism Act, a federal law that I have written extensively about, and testified about before Congress. Similar legislation is also under consideration in California right, as part of the Animal Enterprise Protection Act.

A key difference between this state-level law and the AETA is that it would have created sex-offender style registry within the Tennessee bureau of investigation for “eco-terrorists.” Scary stuff, especially when cops have taken DNA samples of environmental activists. Similar “eco-terrorist” databases were in prior, failed versions of the AETA.

But wait, it gets even better. The bill also defines “person” as meaning “corporation.” And it prohibits “hazardous or injurious devices” including “guns attached to trip wires or other triggering mechanisms.” (Apparently, Niceley would like us to believe that the “eco-terrorists” have been trained by Chuck Norris. However, nothing like this has ever happened).

Total price tag that would have been delivered to Tennessee taxpayers for this gem of a law: $200,000 in recurring costs, $157,800 in one-time costs, and $29,600 in increased incarceration costs.

I remember this bill from a few years ago, and I was so happy to see this clip posted on YouTube recently. [Tom Guleff posted it and added some barnyard noises and graphics. But if you're doubting that this actually happened, I tracked down the original courtesy of the Tennessee General Assembly archives. The "eco-terrorism" bill is up at about 25:50.]

A few of my favorite Niceley quotes:

• On news sources:
  

  “Most of what I’ve heard about the Unabomber has been on the news and on the Rush Limbaugh.”

• On PETA:
  

  “They do a lot of things. The most hideous thing they’ve done is stretch piano wire over jumps, so when fox hunters jump their horse over it catches the rider about the neck. They do all kinds, PETA’s done all kinds, they’re the ones the FBI calls the number one domestic terrorist group in America.”

  (To be clear, that has never been done by PETA or any animal activist.)

• On the growing “eco-terrorist” threat in Tennessee:
  

  “Luckily we don’t have as many wackos yet. But we’re gaining.”

What’s your favorite line from the video?

Following up on the recent post on surveillance, and Big Brother myths, I found this brilliant billboard improvement on the Groundswell Collective blog.

There’s also a YouTube video of the editing in action.

Many thanks to the Billboard Liberation Front for keeping our streets factually accurate.

A children’s book about the police has been, um, “updated” to reflect the “War on Terrorism.” You can view the full project here.